Friends after Kids, a Whole New Ball Game

9/30/2011 11:10:00 AM Posted by mommy2twincesses

I never dreamed how much friendships would change, shift, and just too bluntly state it, be different with kiddos in the mix.
Before having our beautiful identical twin girls DH and I had friends from all walks of life, some married with kids, some married without kids, and even some still single. I will admit to sometimes feeling a sting of resentment when our friends with kids didn’t seem to have time for us and often thought, “well, can’t you just get a babysitter”. But now that we’re in the “married with kids boat” I fully understand what was going on back then and feel more than a little bit ashamed of my selfishness.
Now that we are a happy little family of four things have drastically changed, but I make a real effort to maintain my own individual identity and allow DH the same freedoms too.
We both have time, though drastically limited compared to before, to ourselves, to do the things we enjoy, and to have time with our friends. I wouldn’t say that this happens more than once per month, but still, we make a genuine effort and I think it’s one of the things that keep us sane.
Me and my girly companions make time for each other, scheduled as much in advance as possible, to do things like, chat on the phone, catch a movie, have lunch, go shopping, and sometimes we’re even lucky enough to have a dinner date. DH and his buddies like to play cards, cook out, and hunt. It really doesn’t matter what it is that you do, it’s just important that you set aside time and do it!
There are of course a friend or two who falls by the wayside from time to time, especially when you’re not in similar seasons of motherhood, but don’t give up, flowers that wither can spring back to life with a little love and effort.

What kinds of things do you like to do with your mommy friends? Is it as difficult for everyone to find time outside of family life?


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